letting out

ever had that feeling when you just wanna get away and scream your lungs out because of frustrations? or grab anything beside you and throw it up onto the wall? or punch someone who gets in your way and break his nose? or better yet lock yourself up in the room and cry like a baby? well i did not do any of them, the last one much less. i'm supposed to be tough.. instead, i got myself a gun, a 9mm pistol that is, loaded it with bullets, poked it into my head and shattered my brains out?? not yet or else this would never have been written. i went into an indoor shooting range and got myself a hundred rounds, just enough (when not using ear plugs) to impair my hearing, pound my chest and hopefully numb my heart and mind of any thought that might dare bother me.. when i walked into the room leading to the range, i heard shots and boy i admit was i scared. i never heard gunshots in years, maybe seven. after about 10 shots my heartbeat was normal again. from then on everything went from being a thriller to uhmm normal..


focus.. my grip evidently shows how frustrated i am.. video is on my celphone..


after a hundred rounds and pesos, i was left with a bullet-riddled target (which btw i posted in my cabinet door), adrenalin still pumped into my system, frustrations flushed out but then in no time i was back to reality..

upon leaving the shooting range, i thought to myself that indeed when holding or possessing a firearm one is not only to possess a good marksmanship skills. firstly you should be on your right mind (i failed), be proficient (i failed) and requires so much discipline (i badly failed). at one point i did fire 6 bullets rapidly because i felt i was "into the groove." and it's bad. dangerous to bluntly describe it. no wonder copious gun-related accidents occur even on a simple traffic altercation sadly because of lack of discipline on the gun owner's part.. and so i left with my sanity back to its place, at least for the moment. i roamed the mall afterwards and ate at greenbelt 3. who knows next time you'll see me shooting with a rifle? not at anybody but at outdoor shooting ranges. greater frustrations on the way??